If the World Cup final had been played between the nations with the best soccer writers, England would have faced Brazil. I haven’t been reading the Brazilian press, but I assume the scribes from Rio are as entertaining as their players and fans. There’s no doubt about the quality of the English press. The Observer’s wrapup of the best and worst of the World Cup tournament is fun throughout.
In the category of “Best Moment,” John Carlin nominates the assault, by Spanish midfielder Ivan Helguera, on an Egyptian referee after Spain lost its quarter-final match against South Korea. “In an age when the game has become so asphyxiatingly commercial, Helguera’s unfettered Corinthianism was refreshing,” Carlin writes. “Somewhere in his mind the most intelligent player on the Spain team will have understood that he was risking the end of his international career; possibly even the end of his professional career and the vast riches, as a Real Madrid player, that entails. He didn’t care. The impulse to beat the crap out of the referee, guilty together with his Trinidadian linesman of the fiasco of the tournament, revealed Helguera as a man of flawless moral instincts.”
In the category of “Best Coach,” Paul Wilson proposes Bruce Arena, of the U.S. squad: “Not only did this guy have the best name and preside over the most impressive turnaround since the last World Cup, he came out with my all-time favourite football line: ‘On paper we don’t have a chance against Germany, but this game is played on grass.'”
Finally, Guillem Balague recalls the accommodations in Ulsan, Korea. “I booked a hotel in a place that I was told was near enough to Ulsan, where I was going to see Spain play Slovenia. In fact, it was 30 kilometres away, but the fact that it was a love hotel made up for the disappointment. A love hotel is a place where you take a person of the opposite sex for an evening. The owners offer a stimulating video collection on each floor and chambermaids leave two different tapes next to the television in every room each morning. They’re great for getting in the mood for a hard day of World Cup coverage, apparently. On my last day there I received one with a chubby woman waggling herself to music and another with a different chubby woman who had designs on her female friend. I wondered how they knew about my very secret tastes. But, I must stress, I didn’t watch any.”
