The lead of today’s story in The Washington Post refers to “rocket-launcher-equipped donkey carts” that were used to attack the Palestine and Sheraton hotels in Baghdad. The story describes it as a “donkey-cart offensive” and notes that one of the carts carried a makeshift bomb built from cooking gas cylinders, which Brig. Gen. Mark Kimmitt calls a “donkey bomb.”
“Troops returned fire,” the story continues, “apparently injuring a donkey at the Sheraton and shaking up others. The donkeys were ‘shaken not stirred,’ Kimmitt said. ‘They are alive but one is quite frankly pretty shook up’ . . . Asked about the status of donkeys, Col. William Darley, another Army spokesman, said that while they are not ‘enemy combatants,’ they are ‘deemed to have been co-opted to perform the will of the terrorist elements.'”
Not even The Onion can make up stuff like this.